By Dennis Thompsett, Owen Sound Sun Times
I used to own a cottage out on Balmy Beach. We visited so seldom that I decided to take it off the grid altogether and save all those taxes and delivery fees you get even if you use no electricity. We could use candles and lanterns and fireplaces. It would be fun. Like summer camp. So I asked Hydro One to take the meter away.
Some smug little hydro gnome told me that would not be possible. And if I took it off myself and threw it out on the road with the trash, I could be arrested and they would put it back. And charge me a hefty fee for doing so.
So I learned my lesson: a deal with Hydro One is a deal with the devil.
Take the 10% rebate announced recently on Hydro One bills. Please. It’s a roofie slipped into your drink. And you will awaken to a very rude surprise.
According to Ontario Finance Minister Dwight Duncan, in his recent Fall Economic Update, electricity rates will rise a further 46% over the next five years. After they’ve already gone up nearly 20% over the last seven months. (Curiously, he didn’t mention this). But, hey, you’ll get a 10% rebate starting Jan. 1.
Of course, that 10% will be off the entire bill, after all the unnecessary taxes and stupidity fees are added. Whereas the 46% hike will just be the cost of the electricity. And all the garbage fees will go up accordingly.
So that 10% is not such a Christmas gift after all. And the government has borrowed the $1.1 billion it will cost, at very high interest rates. So those will be added on your bill, too.
And why are electricity costs going up so much anyway? Ahh well, therein lies a sad but typical hat trick of Liberal malfeasance: bad leadership, bad attitude and bad science.
Let’s start with the bad science. The biggest cost of this unprecedented jump will be “green” technology.
Even though, with Climategate, and Global Warming guru Dr Phil Jones’ confession that the data was fudged. That the planet is actually cooling. That the damning hockey stick graph is scientifically insupportable. That the IPCC (The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change) had to admit their report was tainted. And that the earth has experienced much warmer periods long before man could have had anything to do with it.
So man-made global warming is a proven hoax. But Liberals just cannot let anything go that gives them more control. So, even though producing electricity through “green” sources will not do one thing to save the planet and will cost 10, 15 and even 20 times the market rate — they are going to force us to pay those higher rates. For our own good, you know.
And there’s the bad attitude. Like all Liberals, the Ontario government Liberals believe you are incredibly stupid. Only they know how to run your life. You do not. So please shut up.
After all, look at the fine government and the responsible stewardship you get in return, eh?
And that’s the bad leadership. Since the Liberals took over, the deficit in Ontario has climbed an additional 90%, 68%, 51% — well, sources differ, but all agree, it’s astronomical.
And figures never lie.
For example, Duncan also boasted that over 75% of the jobs lost in the recession have been regained. Sounds great. But he also mentioned that income tax was down $1.13 billion this year, thinking we’re too dumb to connect the dots. But it means those weren’t real jobs. They were all low-paying McJobs.
Of course you are way too stupid to understand the intricacies of the economy and job creation. So you shouldn’t worry your pretty little head about it.
Smarter people than you are running things.
And all they want in return for all their selfless hard work is your vote in the upcoming election.
Just try to remember this one thing: 10% off your electricity bill.
And Hydro One and your caring government will continue making your life better and better.
Just vote Liberal. It only takes a second.
Then you can go back to your big screen eh, dummy?